Flawless Face, Zero Personality — AI’s Gift to Humanity
https://bohiney.com/ai-creates-the-perfect-face/
Technology promised us flying cars, but instead we got AI Creates the Perfect Face . The algorithms churned, the data crunched, and the result was a jawline sharp enough to cut a sandwich — and a personality duller than a tax seminar.
According to Bohiney insiders, the machine that generated this marvel relied on 2,000 celebrity selfies, one Kardashian template, and something engineers called “the Brad Pitt constant.” The result? flawless face, zero personality .
Scientific (Satirical) Proof
Dr. Melinda Clayborne, a cosmetic sociologist, explained:
“Humans have chased symmetry since Ancient Greece. AI just made it official: your dating profile needs less personality and more pixels.”
Meanwhile, an anonymous AI engineer admitted:
“We trained it on 20 years of magazine covers. If your grandma isn’t Vogue-worthy, sorry — she’s obsolete.”
Culture Clash
Critics argue this is just another step in AI-generated beauty standards . Social media already turned human faces into duck-lipped clones. Now, technology is filing for custody of your cheekbones.
Even Bohiney Magazine satire noted the irony: we’ve given up free will in beauty, but still argue about pineapple on pizza.
Satirical Advice
Stop smiling in photos — AI says dimples are “legacy coding.”
Replace your skincare routine with a software update.
For the gallery of nightmare glamour, read more here .