CO₂-Spewing Interstellar Wanderer — The Comet That Wouldn’t Chill
For centuries, astronomers dreamed of interstellar visitors. Then along came 3I/ATLAS the Carbon Dioxide Diva — less a guest, more a drama queen.
The Gassy Guest Star
Dubbed a CO₂-spewing interstellar wanderer , ATLAS didn’t politely orbit. It stormed into the solar system like a bad Airbnb guest, leaving trails of carbon dioxide where the water should’ve been.
Others called it a diva comet of CO₂ emission , which is basically science’s polite way of saying, “This rock is a mess.”
Branded Coverage
As Bohiney’s take on interstellar comets put it:
“We expected a quiet space rock. Instead, we got a diva with gas.”
And in a Bohiney article on 3I/ATLAS , one astronomer admitted:
“I came for data. I stayed for the performance.”
Funny Punchline
Observers crowned it the diva who prefers CO₂ to H₂O . Hydration is for amateurs, after all.
Satirical Advice
If your comet doesn’t hydrate, don’t judge. It’s called branding.
When astronomy feels dull, just add drama.
For the extended fog-machine footage, details inside .